More than just the crumbs.

Most have their ‘me time’ at night, when you have no energy left. You’re giving yourself crumbs which is why you spend it scrolling or watching. My ‘me time’ should be when i’m at my best...png

Do you know who Rachel Hollis is? DO YOU KNOW WHO RACHEL HOLLIS IS? Yes, I was emphatically asking you that question.

I don’t know which instagrammmer it was but someone along the way in the last 6 months snapped a picture of them reading the book “Girl wash your face” by Rachel Hollis. Linked here at Amazon and here at Amazon Australia.. go buy it now..don’t wait just buy it. There are great parts to the book and not so great parts (like with every book) but I can absolutely tell you that it has changed my life!

If you know me in person you’ll know that since the birth of baby number duos I have lost a lot of weight.. I’m talking like 45 pounds/20kgs+.. I totally credit my weightloss to two really really hard but rewarding things:

  • The Sweat App- The program BBG by Kayla Itsines gave me that spark I needed to actually start exercising in the comfort of my own home because like legit, who has the time to go to the gym more than twice a week.. especially with 2 kids under 5.. it’s not going to happen.. Did I mention that my husband was training for a marathon while and after I gave birth? Hello 2+ hour runs..

and

  • Reading Girl wash your face by Rachel Hollis- I don’t remember much of the book to be honest (I’ve started re-reading it) but one thing that I do remember is her saying something to the effect of- “if you plan to workout (at any certain time) and then you decide not to or get too busy you are breaking a promise to yourself.” We can’t handle it when other people let us down or break promises to us why is it okay for us to break promises to ourselves? This simple statement got me through those times where I thought 9pm was too late to workout or putting on gym clothes at 6am when I was so exhausted. Just a year before I probably broke promises to myself multiple times a week- now, it’s rare if I go a day without a run or 28 minute workout.

While I know these two things may not work for everyone they worked for me.

One morning last week I jumped into the car and on a whim decided to check if Rachel Hollis had a podcast. I figured- she’s cool and hip and speaks really well- she’s bound to have a podcast.. and lo and behold she did!

Hello most recent episode called “How to supercharge your morning routine.” I think someone came to my house and looked in our room every morning. I drrraaaggggg myself out of bed about 45minutes before I need to leave the house. I am exhausted you guys.. Reagan is a good sleeper unless she’s sick or teething which has pretty much been our lives the past month. Thank the Lord for my amazing husband who has bared the brunt of this- he has fed her and changed her at unGodly hours of the morning (or night.. it’s all a blur to me). Without him I would have lost my mind.. legitimately lost my mind.

Anyway I digress- “how to supercharge your morning.” You guys.. she drops truth bombs for about 45 minutes straight. The biggest thing that stuck out for me was when she talked about “me time.” At first I scoffed.. “me time”.. she obviously doesn’t have little children because there is no “me time” only “slave time”. But guys she’s onto something.. she talked about how we’re only giving ourselves crumb me time.. as in, our “me time” generally happens at the end of the day after we’ve worked all day, taken care of the kids, showered and fed everyone etc which is why our ”me time” usually involves Netflix or scrolling through Instagram for an hour.. we’re running on fumes by the time we get our time. She suggests moving ‘me time’ to first thing in the morning. Right off the bat.. wake up 1-2 hours before you actually need to wake up and do something that sets your soul on fire!

Guys, I’m going to do it. If words had ever slapped me in the face this was the day.

I can only imagine how hard it’s going to be tomorrow morning but you know if Rach can do it so can I! Haha..

Heart Whispers

Ramblings from when we first brought Reagan home… (and I never posted for fear of judgement)

A bird lands on the pram next to me as I watch my eldest play in the sand. A quick flick of my hand and the bird flies away. I grab the cap for my youngest’s pacifier- would birds think it’s food? Not sure, but I don’t want to take the chance. I make a mental note to sanitise my hands after touching the handle of the pram.

Her voice cuts through the millisecond of silence- “faster mumma, I want to go faster.. The slide, I want to go on the slide”.. I’m brought back to reality and slow the spinning contraption in front of me down so she can get off. I wrangle her arms around the baby strapped to my chest and lift her off. I watch her navigate through the sand towards the big slide, a little boy nearby catches her eye but he’s quite a bit younger than her, she looks away disinterested. “I want to go on the swing mumma.. the swing.. the swing..” She won’t stop till I acknowledge what she’s said. I push the pram over to the edge of the swing set and gingerly step through the sand to push her. “Higher mumma.. higher..” “Patience” I exclaim .. it sounds meaner then I wanted it to.

You wanted this.. I hear my heart whisper..

The baby on my chest stirs.. I start the mumma bounce- one hand pats her little bottom while I make the white noise “shhhhh” sound for a solid minute hoping that she lulls back to sleep. “I want to get off mumma.. I want to go on the small slide..” “Really? You just got on the swing..” I exclaim.

If you can just make it to nap time.. I hear my heart whisper.

I think in terms of hours now. 3 hours till the next bottle, 4 hours till nap time.. if I stretch bottle number 2 I can get them both to nap at the same time. Dinner is in 2 hours if I do bottle four at 6pm. If I go to sleep right this minute I’ll get 5 hours of sleep or I stay up for bottle number 6 and then get 4 hours of sleep..

You don’t have me time.. I hear my heart whisper..

I lay on the carpet, willing and coaxing my newborn to lift her head.. if she can just look to the left. I can feel the anxiety building in my chest. I’ve googled neck issues consecutive nights this week. I’ve rotated her bed, I’ve called her name- nothing seems to be working. I’ve been on a seesaw of celebration and worry. Was it something during pregnancy, maybe something I ate, maybe she was too squished in my womb.

It’s your fault.. I hear my heart whisper..

I see crumbs littering the floor beside the kitchen.. The vacuum cleaner sits beside the staircase. How are there crumbs already- I only vacuumed an hour ago. Dishes peak out from the top of the sink. I see her bright pink and orange bowl. It was used to house a chocolate biscuit but really only held for decoration. Chocolate crumbs scatter the couch- I say a quick prayer that she didn’t smoosh the chocolate into the fabric.

You can’t keep this house clean.. I hear my heart whisper..

We have dinner guests tonight..as our guests file through the door my eldest runs over to her sister and with a “ta-da” pose exclaims- “Here’s my bubba! She’s such a cute bubba!” I feel tears prick my eyes.. “This is her dummy and her bouncer..This is Baby Raegan..”

These are your girls..I hear my heart whisper..

I stir from sleep, reaching for my phone- it’s 6:05am. I feel a weight near my legs and look up to see my eldest with her Eeyore teddy leaning into the bassinet. A moment of panic sets in until the silence is broken by her little voice “Eeyore.. this is Baby Raegan..” Hello.. hello.. hello baby.. mmwwaa..” I’m lulled back to sleep by her voice introducing Fluffy Bunny..

She has such a kind heart.. I hear my heart whisper..

Working out – post baby!

Prior to getting pregnant with Ava I was running 3-5 times a week.. I was also unofficially competing with my husbands father every  month on the Nike app to get more km’s/miles than him.. I’m not sure if he was actually aware of it which is why I saw “unofficially competing!”

When I miscarried late last year I thought it may have something to do with me continuing to run, so I stopped all exercise.. from memory I only started running again well after 3 months.. I stopped again at the 7 month mark- it was getting to awkward.. I take my hat off to all those women who compete in marathons at 8 months pregnant- good for you!!!

While I was pregnant, I continued wearing my normal gym wear- I was dying for maternity tights but couldn’t find them anywhere!! Only recently I noticed Cotton on had a maternity active wear range– say what?!?!

What I’ve also noticed is that active wear has gotten so so expensive! Greg and I are Nike fanatics- I love the feel of their clothing and their designs- but honestly, who is spending $160 on tights.. TIGHTS?!?!?! I made it my mission to find similar looking items for a lot less! You can definitely look great, have good work out gear and not break the bank!

If you just had a baby I would recommend going and getting new work out or running gear. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but a new pair of tights or a new pair of shoes will go a long way in getting you back into it- trust me!!

I picked two companies that have pretty expensive items- Nike and Lorna Jane and found similar looking items for A LOT less.. I hope the below is helpful!

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Nike- Tights and Top // Cotton on- Tights and Top

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Lorna Jane- Tights and Top // Kmart- Top // Cotton On- Tights

As for actually working out or running, my recommendation is to do what you feel comfortable with! I’ve walked a lot since Ava was born- I highly recommend walking- it’s a lot less strenuous and you can go a lot further. I struggled to run for 25min last week but can walk for upwards of an hour on any given day. If you live in Australia there is a company/facebook community called Running Mums Australia– I highly recommend joining the group- it’s a great support network! If you were somewhat of a runner prior to baby and you don’t have the motivation to start again I would recommend downloading the Nike + Run Club app- you can set goals to run a certain distance by a certain time and be “trained” by a coach on each run. Whatever you decide to do- remember- you just carried and brought a baby into this world- and that is an amazing achievement!

Ava May- 7 weeks on..

We are 7 weeks into this parenting experience! I don’t think you can even call it ‘parenting’ at this age? More like, 7 weeks into the new job role of bottle feeder, burper and high-pitched laughs.

Ava is growing and developing well- we had her 6 week shots last week which were terrible, but she was fine after the initial jab (my poor baby).. yes, I was a blubbering mess.. She’s consistently sleeping through the night, waking only once to feed- we’re on a pretty good routine at the moment. The only problem with this routine is that she eats when we eat.. will I ever have a hot meal again?! I made a list a few days ago of all the things I haven’t done since the birth of Ava (the list is pretty comical!!):

  • Had a shower lasting longer than 15min
  • Eaten toast (at breakfast) while it was still hot..scratch that..eaten any meal while it’s still hot
  • Drank a full cup of coffee at breakfast while it’s still hot
  • Drank ANY beverage at breakfast and finished it while it was still hot
  • Gone on a date with my husband.. unless church music practice counts?? HA.. (we are ticking this off the list tonight..)
  • Left the house in less than 5min
  • Only done one load of washing a week… Who knew something so small could create SO MUCH LAUNDRY
  • Picked something to wear in less than 2 min- now it goes through the if-spit-up-was-to-fall-on-this-item-would-it-stain test..

 

Raising Ava has been nothing but joy..despite all the challenges new mums face! Some days I find myself worried that I am failing – am i under stimulating her, am I not talking to her enough, is she too hot or too cold, am I going to make her sick (I’ve been battling the flu for a week), does she need more Vitamin D (she is PALE folks), what milestones should she be hitting at this age.. if she hitting them?! So many what ifs and questions.. they don’t give you a manual when you have a baby.. I wouldn’t mind a how-to on ‘raising a functioning, caring and loving child’- the tagline could be: ways to not stunt their growth or crush their dreams.. It would cover everything from birth to say 14ish (after 14 your on you own…ha.. I can’t help you there..even I turned feral around this age)

I found this quote the other day which perfectly reflects the need I have for God to be involved daily in this new season of my life..

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I can imagine that as Ava gets older the ‘load’ of motherhood will sometimes get heavy and complicated – but I truly believe I need just as much of God today that I will in 10 years time.

Below are some photos of my angel baby.. By no means am I a professional photographer however I have a pretty good Nikon camera which I’ve tried to work out myself..img_1846img_1847img_1848img_1849

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A heart for the home!

A few weeks ago I came across the below picture on instagram by Awaken Gathering- I took a screenshot with the intent of re-posting it when I felt to- that hasn’t happened yet (can you blame me).

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This simple image profusely spoke to me. I can imagine there are quite a few mum’s out there who feel like they’re drowning in things that need to be done, errands that need to be run, commitments that were agreed to that we should have said no to, school pick ups and drop offs, dinners to plan, personal goals to achieve- I’m sure the list can go on and on.. You may find yourself wondering where time has gone. You blink and you’ve reached another weekend, another birthday, another anniversary.

I am surrounded by some of the most incredible women you will ever meet- trust me! I have seen many of them pursue their own goals and dreams while profusely loving their husbands and nurturing their children. They work full time and part time jobs outside of the home and yet manage life so effortlessly (it would seem). I know a lot of prayer and planning goes into their day-to-day lives!

So, if you are reading this and you feel like you are an overwhelmed mum- let me give you some encouragement- YOU ARE AMAZING! The fact that you birthed (or adopted or fostered) that child makes you amazing! The pain you may have experienced (in childbirth or through the heart wrenching process of adoption or fostering) will one day (if not already) be overshadowed with indescribable love. The lack of sleep you may be experiencing (yet here you are functioning like nobody’s business) will one day help you stay awake to watch that marathon at the Olympics in 4 years at midnight- YOU ARE AMAZING!

I promise you that there will be another pile of washing after you get this pile done (trust me- I have a newborn that has pooped through 4 outfits already). I promise you that your kids will not care that you served 2 minute noodles for dinner a few times this week. I promise you that your husband won’t mind going to get take-out because you just couldn’t manage to grocery shop today. These things are all fleeting and will come and go like the wind.

Being mum to your child/children is what really counts and you are doing amazing!!

Coincidentally today is also R U Ok? day here in Australia. If you’re not from Australia you can read here on how the day came about. Rocked by the suicide of his father, Gavin Larkin began the campaign to have Aussie’s around the country (and the world), on the 8th of September, ask friends and family if they are okay!

Dad’s/Husbands if you are reading this- I challenge you to ask your wives and partners today if they are doing okay- be their cheerleader today! Mum’s, text a friend today and find out if they’re coping with life at the moment! Remind her that you are in her corner- grab those pom poms and start cheering!!